If you're a regular reader and have been for a while now, it probably didn't escape your notice that I around Christmas I disappeared off the blogging scene and re-appeared a month later. Having broken up with my boyfriend and happily dating my girlfriend.
I was always very open with you guys about my girlfriend. That's probably because me and my girlfriend had a long chat soon after we started dating officially about how best to avoid problems when coming out. So, in the end we decided not to, we'd pretend nothing had ever been different, people would assume we'd already taken the crap for it and leave us be. It was a long shot, but in most parts of our lives, for some reason it worked ! I detoxed my life of anyone and anything that didn't make me happy, went into college and held her hand.
Obviously it wasn't quite that simple. With my family, complications with my ex boyfriend ( some of my older readers may remember that I used to talk of him fondly on my blog and say how happy I was with him, I also spoke like this in really life in a desperate attempt to convince myself because if I'm honest I was scared, but that caused a lot of confusion in the aftermath of the break up ) and the odd 12 year old shouting abuse at me and my girlfriend down the street. But we made it and it was worth it and I couldn't be happier with my girl.
It was really hard at first, I'd cry most nights and the question " Should I let go of your hand ? " when walking past somebody we knew in the street, was a regular one, Until one day I realised nothing felt like holding her hand. I almost lost her once just before we got together and I remember waking up that morning and knowing that I'd hurt her and it felt like my heart had shattered and the broken pieces were ripping my stomach to shreds. I remember feeling so sick at the bus stop that I just had to call her and she shouldn't of answered ... but she did and then I knew she always would. The next day she would tell me about the life we were going to have and the fluffy towels that would always be in our bathroom... but more on that another time. For now, all you guys or anybody else need to know , is that I love her.
So here's the coming out post. You get it now, six months late but here you go. I'm gay, I'm cool with that and I hope you are too. If any of you want to see more posts on or around this subject area or would like to hear more information on specific parts of this subject then let me know in the comments. Or If any of you would like to talk in private then don't hesitate to email me !
My Email : MyHappyBubbleXx@outlook.com
As always, I love you guys loads and all I want to say is , love who you love. It won't always be easy but it never is in any relationship but if it's the right one, it will also be good and worth it I promise so hang in there <3
Stay Strong <3 Stay Smiley :)
Lots of love, Marianne xxx